YES! YES! IQ too

So I took the IQ test and I'm obviously pleased with the results, otherwise I won't be posting it now will I? :) Please feel free to take one too. Quick warning, it's recreational, please don't get all caught up in what it spits out. well, unless it calls you a genius like me, then...you're permitted

The Classic IQ Test

My Result: Visionary Philosopher

Your mind's strengths allow you to think ahead of the game — to imagine or anticipate what should come next in just about any situation. Because you're equally skilled in the numerical and verbal universes of the brain, you can draw from multiple sources of information to come up with great ideas. The timelessness of your vision and the balance between your various skills are what make you a Visionary Philosopher.



In addition to your strengths in math and linguistics, you have a knack for matching and anticipating patterns. These skills and your uncanny ability to detect the underlying blueprint of most of life's situations add to your Visionary Philosopher mind.
Two philosophers who share the same combination of skills you possess are Plato and Benedict Spinoza. Spinoza had insight into how things worked in the world. He could envision a future based on the patterns he saw in life, and used mathematical logic as a structure within which to present his philosophical arguments. With that base he was able to use logic to formulate his theories. Borrowing from his linguistic strengths he wrote eloquent texts and, therefore, was able to bring his philosophical ideas and structure to the rest of the world. His story exemplifies the talents that are present in the Visionary Philosopher intellectual type.



Whatever you decide to do in life, you've got a powerful mix of skills and insight that can be applied in a wide variety of ways. You can expand your mind to understand a situation. Your strong balance of math and verbal skills will help you explain things to others. For example, if you were on an archaeological dig and discovered an object, you could probably use your deductive powers to figure out not only what the object was but also how it was used. Given your ability to put things together, you are more than capable of inventing a life plan that is in synch with your perspective on how things were, how they are, and how they might be one day.

Take this test >

Talk to me...

I always have something to write, I simply never get to write it, but here goes:

Something freaky has been happening to me lately. ...So, if you know me, or really, are one of the two people who often, not, visit the Niger Area, then you will know that I have been riding on a roller coaster for a little bit now. Well, I sort of resigned to it so I guess it's no longer a roller coaster. I can't find the words to explain this, this feeling, or flow if you will, but I have been sort of gliding smoothly without doing much to propel myself forward. I've, well, just been moving forward.
Ok, so even the two people who read my blog won't understand that, even I barely do..., but that's sorta the way I feel. Anyways, lately, every little bible verse I read, sermon I listen to, devotional website I view, has been hauntingly direct. And I haven't read, listened or viewed much lately. It is so bothersome to me that I am actually about to stop in my tracks and meditate.
I think all the time, analyze every situation, that's not the issue. The issue is that in meditating I have to involve faith. I don't jump into a ditch because common sense says it'll hurt, but faith, goodness, faith, only faith, or madness anyways, will instruct you to jump. So yeah, I sort of have been going the common sense route, much easier. So now you see why understandably all these messages I'm receiving via EVERY channel trying to mess up my conveniently structured life of christian compromise and common sense are causing a panic.

To be honest though, this is what happens when you belong to God.
I'm not sure if I asked him to talk to me, I mean, I'm always praying; I learnt early on to pray ceaselessly, so even when I am done! as in, really, done where I'm not even sure God exists, or it's all his fault..., whatever it is that I could possibly be going through, during all that, I pray. No it's not blasphemy, it is human. Sometimes you go through stuff that changes you. Any situation that was powerful enough to change you impacted your belief system too. So your faith is the first thing you praise or question, depending on what direction the pendulum swung.
...but I belong to God. So in times of confusion, He talks to me subtly, but firmly. So, today, my spiel is to remain under God's radar, and the best way to do that is to keep talking to Him. Think of Him as your dad. If you're close to your father then you know that you communicate in tough times and the neater ones. He'll talk to you and arrange your day in such a way that you can't help but listen.

Well, my convenient life of compromise and doing whatever is about to change. It's been very neat. Even in my eyes, things make sense this way, but I'm listening and I know things have to change even though it won't be a quick cinch. Now to understand and do His will....

Choices…

There is a table with a variety of vases on display.
In the center of the table sits a delicate glass vase; so fragile and thin that when the sun's rays split through it the one who beholds the view is rewarded with an explosive collage of colors. This vase in all its fragility demands a high price.
Surrounding this fragile vase are several more, indulgently adorned with an array of patterns and colors; beautiful in their own right and sturdy yet unequivocally more affordable than the estranged one in their core.
The questions then are… (Do think about it feverishly before you are quick to answer):
Which of these vases would you buy and why?
Would there be a reason to buy another instead?
Is there a right or wrong answer?

Better sex...

It's funny, someone once chided me for my use of ellipsis (...) and for some reason, I remembered after entering my title. hmmm...I need to master the art of selective memory loss. Almost there, but not quite.

"The act of Craving sex is actually better than the act of Sex itself."

Don't be tempted to think the message bearer hasn't experienced good sex before. That is a moot point, seeing as craving sex is relative to the act of the resulting sex. So at best one, can argue that the imagination of said person is significantly rich.

It is my belief, and a pretty common one at that, that women can work wonders with their imagination. For instance, whereas men can be cheaply turned on simply by observing a sexual image, women, also have the capability to do that, but more often rely on their imagination to get them to the point of physical reaction. Perhaps rely is inaccurate, a woman can get a physical reaction from looking at an image also, one that conjures memories for instance; the phrase "assisted by" their imagination seems more accurate. In any case, a woman's combination of anticipation and imagination brings her to a height that levels out during the actual act. During sex, imagination is often non-existent as it often is a choice to make between imagining and experiencing, further more, anticipation is often halted during great sex again because anticipation leads to imagination and imagination takes away from the experience. The lack of these two essential attributes of the female is what has led me to my conclusion. I'm sure a lot of people disagree with me :) In fact, sometimes I do too, but it is such a fun theory to explore. To the nay-sayers, the beauty or perhaps irony of it all is that the slowing down or complete halting of imagination and anticipation only occurs when the sex is atomic....

A woman's dilemma

Is a woman destined to a constant barrage of unwelcome advances?

Why can't I just waltz into the lunch room without thinking about the next insult to dish to the idiot that has asked me out a million times, whom I have said no to and yet continually winks and flirts with me? (I reported him to his manager by the way. I think that one quickly mutated into harassment)
Why do I have to tell a guy to stop touching me simply because he has touched too much and it just doesn't seem simply "friendly" anymore?
Why do I have to constantly talk about my family to someone who likes to pretend as though they don't exist and recreate "jokingly" me and him scenarios?
Why do I have to tell someone I don't want to hear about any more personal issues, not because I don't want to help, but because he's getting too comfortable and starting to become dependent, thinking he's in love?
Why do I have to cut people off who would be valuable business partners, tennis partners, study buddies, gym buddies, plain old friends...?

Majority of these men know I am married before they approach me, the others know it soon after, but yet, they keep trying, some simply like to flirt, others are constantly drooling. Regardless, I find it infuriating especially when I find the guy repulsive or, to be less harsh, not particularly attractive, then I actually feel more insulted than I thought I could ever be; couple that with the fact that it is pretty depressing.

Generally, I assumed that marriage will be the end of unwanted advances. I'm not silly, "end" is obviously a hyperbole, but still, it appears to have gotten worse. Some people have a theory, that married people are more confident, charismatic and will approach anyone while being easily approachable also. "More" in this sense is relative to the version of said person when he/she was single.
My single friends want me around when there are any mixers, they think I start up the party and get people interacting, they think it's a married thing...; perhaps.
In any case, a woman has a more attractive personality when married I hear.
Some others have a theory, that generally married people are safe. They don't want to leave their spouses for a fling, they just want to have sex with other people and go home, so no strings attached sex is still heavily sought after, and a married woman is the best candidate for such a seeking man, or, a married woman is in search of such sex herself and so is approachable.
Whatever the theory, a polite and subtle "No" should suffice and get an advancing man off a woman's back. Inasmuch as one would hate to repeat one's self, in the event that doesn't work, a glaring and insulting "No" should get such a man to concede turn in the opposite direction and never look back...but alas, it only works that way in a perfect world.

So what about welcomed but perhaps unhelpful advances...

Arrrrrrrrrrrgh...

What is it with NYorkers and body odors? Gosh! What happened to antipersperant? Oh, wait, or the good ol' shower routine? How can people stink so much and be oblivious to the pain they cause others? Or perhaps they don't care? Gosh! Could it be that they have given up? Goodness forbid!

Understanding the Main Character of the Good Book

So I started reading the Bible over again. Yeah, “again” can be deceiving because it suggests that I have, at one time, completed reading the Good Book. Nah! I have started a few times, but I’m yet to finish. In any case, I am starting with the New Testament. Every morning on the bus on my way to the city I pick up my little New Testament Bible and read a few chapters. No pressure, just me and the Book.
There’s just something a little different about this renewed ambition of mine. Perhaps that’s an inaccurate description of this "thing" and the primary reason for the difference; it is not an ambition like the other times, not a chore, or an obligation assigned by Church, not a memory verse marathon, or a miracle and parable seeking adventure…, it’s simply a quest to know my maker better. People say not to read the Bible like a novel, but I almost disagree. I say almost because you read fictional and nonfictional novels in two different ways. For both types of novels, you get to know the main character of the book intimately. If permitted, and one often is, you can tell where the character is coming from, where they are and you plan with them where they are going to. The fictional novel forces you to take sides, you're excited, anxious, you feel all those emotions in the series as they were carefully orchestrated by the writer, but with the nonfictional, you pay attention, you are not anxious, excited...you feel the pulse of the character, you don't attempt to manipulate the character or the story, instead you attempt to completely understand. And that is why often, a nonfictional story is the same no matter how many times you read it, but the fictional always reads like a new book with a new opened warp zone every time you pick it up. Oh Blah! For whatever reason, I find that I understand Jesus better. I feel like I know "who" He is. As in, likes and dislikes...that sort of thing. The phrase "What Would Jesus Do?" WWJD now has a totally new meaning to me. I don't quickly recall the ten commandments or quickly try to put Him in that scenario, using full color imagination and so on, I am now getting to the place where I can quickly decipher what is acceptable, right and true, what He will do...but even scarier is the fact that I can also demarcate between a preacher peddling his word as God's and God's own words.
Let's think about this some more.

For God or for us?
Remember when Jesus went into the temple and scattered the money changers and the dove sellers? Well, the money changers were probably changing money for offering, not for traders and the dove sellers were probably selling doves to be used in offerings, not for soup...all for God, and yet, He himself threw them out. How is that different from all the things that are sold in the church today, whether the church bookstore, or the hats sold after church, or the olive oil sold in the bookstore, or the checks (money changers) we write....

Impossible and sensible or Possible?
Or how about the 5000 Jesus fed? and the 4000? Remember how the people had stayed to listen to Jesus, and how the disciples had asked that the crowd be sent back to go look for their own food, and how when Jesus had said that the people be fed instead the disciples looked at him like he was joking? Well, Jesus fed them. Now though, you can stay at convention for days without being fed, even big churches cannot spend that extra cash to feed the people, instead, the people pay for the "conventions" and "conferences" and it remains such an impossible feat to feed the crowd.

The inside or the outside of the cup?
And remember when the pharisees were sweating Jesus because his disciples did not wash their hands in the ritualistic way before eating, or plucked the grain of wheat to eat on sabbath, how Jesus said the pharisees focused too much on doctrines that they had now preached as though it was God's word and how they should instead focus on God? Brood of vipers he called them. How are things different today? So many rules, don't watch T.V., don't put on earrings, don't put on pants (trousers) if you are female and if you do these things you are sinning.... Hello? And how much we focus on paying our tithes, of course you should pay tithes, it is the commandment of God, but how much we focus on that more than we focus on the greatest two commandments "Love your God above all, Love your neighbour as yourself". The inside vs. outside....

Every time I write passionately, my words are many, but they are a serious tangle due to the speed at which they pour out of my head and the sheer volume of all I have to say, so I end up not saying anything close to what I have to say. All the same, I pray you understand my words and are blessed.

The worm wiggling in the Big Apple

You see them on every street. Actually, you only see them your first two days in the city; soon afterwards, your eyes are open, but you see nothing, them included. At the pace you carry on day three, after you have been submersed in the unnecessarily fast culture and have risen up looking more like the inhabitants, it's no surprise that everything else is a blur around you.

Yes, I too race through the massive human traffic at 6pm towards my bus, eagerly looking forward to that wide soft seat that is barely reclined even though it has the capabilities because the drudges of the city will start a fit "your chair is on my knee" they'll cry. In the bus, I experience serenity, peace and quiet...till a phone breaks the silence...

The worm:
At first sight, you see an extremely dirty looking man or woman, this is your first two days in the city, quickly you dart to the other side. You don't make it there because the human traffic does not permit, but you do get a solid foot away.

See, in the city you're always sprinting somewhere; to your 3 o'clock meeting, that you will arrive to fifteen minutes early, but so what?, to Ginger House where there's always a waiting line, and since there's always one, you can never get there too early or late, oh and you have nothing waiting on your desk, but still you sprint, to catch your train home, it comes every 10 mins, no particular schedule, it just comes and yet you sprint...

They're no longer human, well not a hundred percent. Their legs resemble tree logs; the texture and size. Short stumpy logs with dead skin the color of white chalk scattered over a dark brown base. An arch of green mold over each eye lid, on what looks to be where the eye brows used to be. Hair, either a massive confusion of dirty hide or a scanty wet rag over the face. They drag their legs behind their slowly decaying bodies when moving from one place to the other. They're the only ones who don't appear to be in a hurry. A sit here or there for an hour is not unusual.
One can't help but wonder where the destination is when they're moving. Surely if they had a place to go they wouldn't look like this. Yet when they are sitting in the same spot for a while, one wonders again "what next?" and food? What will they eat? Yet these beings exist in the financial capital of the world, moving in an exaggerated slow motion while the brokers, analysts, delivery boys, construction workers, yellow cab drivers, plaque holders and their types race around them with a speed so swift that the invisible, the homeless of the city spin in a defeated daze like ghosts wandering in a world that is not theirs.
Such is the worm wiggling in the Big Apple. It is disgusting, but no one sees it. The shiny red coat of the Apple is too alluring to most. It's lovers greedily take big giant bites without a care for what else is in it.

"Everyone in the city makes six figures now" except for that man or woman who cannot buy a dollar meal at McDonalds.

Caine Prize for African writing

A Ugandan, Monica Arac de Nyeko beat three Nigerians and a South African to win this year’s Caine Prize for African Writing. How exciting that there were three Nigerian finalists and yet disappointing that not one of them won. Her book Jambula Tree is about two young lesbian girls and the Jambula Tree is the precious spot from which a neighbor spies on the girls; the fruit of the tree represents the girls breasts, and so on and so forth that make this book very African and exotic, no doubt to the judges, in its use of prose and symbolisms. I’m sure the book is great, but I am inclined to believe that she got an edge, no matter how minute, over her peers because she wrote on a topic that is considered taboo in Africa,but then, that is one of the things that makes for an interesting read, something new, different, bold....

I have to reveal that the thought of one day writing a book that would be published and considered for such a prestigious award has put me back on dream lane. I love to write. I don’t write as much as I feel like, but I would love to one day complete a book that would be published. God bless my dreams in Jesus’ name.

There are so many young Nigerian authors these days that make me proud. I am spending the rest of my summer reading their books. My next book is by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Half of a Yellow Sun. I have heard so much about the book that I must delve into it as soon as work gives me time. Then there’s Helen Oyeyemi’s The Icarus Girl. Brrrr…that’s a horror one, but an impressive piece of literature for such a young girl who was nineteen at the time she wrote it. I am currently reading an older book by a Senegalese, God’s Bit’s of Wood by Ousmane Sembene who passed away I think earlier this year. What inspiration I draw from Sub-Saharan African Authors. God bless them all. And my Nigerians; I hope to one day meet Chinua Achebe, I haven’t tried to yet and so the word hope is a very unnecessary and emotional word at this time, but I will like to meet him nevertheless. Wole Soyinka is another author I appreciate. Of course, his notes and books need a lot more attention and passion, because he writes it in a very intellectual way, and so you cannot casually pick up his books and quick-read a few chapters, but that is also why I am drawn to his writing. I do hope that these authors, as with other Africans who excel in their passion mentor other young Africans to achieve even greater.

Kudos to African Authors.

Thoughts in bubbles

....It's dim and everything is sleepy green. hmmm...smells lightly like grannie smith, except I don't have an apple, it's the candles.. I'm taking a bubble bath, marinating under warm soapy water, listening to Jill Scott, sipping on wine and typing on my laptop. The bathroom door is wide open, the bedroom door and every other door leading to the bathroom except for the entrance into the house. I can hear beyond Jill's sultry voice...nothing. It's blissful!
Everytime I get to do this I find myself walking on cloud nine. I don't even know why I decided to pick up my laptop, but uhm, sometimes you want to express the way you feel, make it tangible. What better way to do that than to write, or type I guess (geez! how technology has spoiled us).

Still marinating...

Fetish...

I'm developing a new fetish. Yeah! It's like, I've been all about guiters recently. I'm crazy about drums, they'll be my first love forever; talking drums, jazz, congos..., but yeah, the guitar. It feels like infidelity.
I was just watching the Skentele Skontolo video and the guitarist in it was looking so chill and my ggodness, just yummy. And the guitarist in Alicia Keys' live performance.... Skinny men just nodding and playing with strings, but gosh, it has a warming effect that just seems to massage away the knot at the back of my neck.

Wait! So is it the guitars or the guitarists?

Not so current event

Gosh I hate current events. It's like only the depressing issues catch the news waves.
VTech shooting!
Just over a week ago a 22 year old man went on a shooting rampage at the Virginia Tech campus, killing 32 people including himself.
A moment of silence and no typing for the VTech students who lost their lives to Cho.



When situations like this occur, I am quickly brought back to my knees, feverishly thanking my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ for the undeserved and yet abundant mercy and favor that he bestows upon me and my family. You look at the profiles of the people who perished and you can't help but wonder what makes one better than them. I leave home hurriedly everyday, I cut people off on the highway, park illegally, walk into class late more than I would like to, eat bad food, again more than I would like to, but yet I expect to be home later every single day. So far the cops have not found a link between Cho and his victims, and one can say that the only differentiating factor between the person that wasn't shot and the person that was is the will of God. Don't analyze that statement too much, what that means is you could have had reason to be at that location at that time, or Cho could have had reason to shoot up your location at that time. My condolences go to the families.

Gun laws
How could Cho legally prance around for weeks with two automatic rifles that he eventually used to expire other lives. The argument for freedom to bare firearms simply begs the question. We can't blame the police, or the school or anyone else for that matter.
The laws governing the state of Virginia made it impossible to force the troubled boy to rehab, the campus is not a confined area, that means it is virtually impossible to regulate, in the manner that would have avoided the tragedy.... In other words, there are so many things that could not have been avoided without hindsight, but the one thing that could was the ease at which Cho got his automatic rifles. If automatic guns were illegal, he might have shot one or two people, maybe even three, but even his peers would have been able to confine him. A table to the head or knees, even a slap, but who the hell was going to walk up to a racket of bullets. The best one could do would be to forfeit one's life to save another, and several of the deceased did that. A common saying "Even freedom comes with responsibility" is useless to an irresponsible or disturbed person. As is obvious Total freedom is never free. One can even say that It is possible to be enslaved by total freedom

Good girls go to Heaven, bad girls go everywhere!!!

What's wrong with that statement? Well, everywhere includes hell!...and a whole bunch of other fun places...that also end in hell. What a mess.

For the first time in my life I feel as though I have made a 180 degree turn away from the right direction. Well, it's not sudden, it's been a dirty and turbulent, excruciatingly tasking and churning turn. Don't misinterpret my statement to mean I have been naive and now have become enlightened by a bite of the forbidden fruit. That would have sounded pretty cool, and perhaps a lot more forgiving, but it's not the case. I have always been cognizant of everything around me, I have my shares of lures, but I guess, to relate it to the title, I have always had my eyes set on Heaven, and so made conscious decisions to lead me through to that path. Nah! I've never been a saint, well not since I turned 7, but I always quickly realized what I considered errors, a lot were repeated, but again, I felt at minimum a twinge of guilt. All of that now appears to have dissipated into thin air! I have given others the power to change me and now I can feel myself stirring off course and I can't turn around. Perhaps what's worse is not that I really can't turn around, but that I don't want to. What's beautiful though is that I realize that my being bothered about not been bothered means that I have a remnant I can reawaken and rebuild. I know it sounds like an easy feat turning full circle, but ummm, there's a reason why potential energy differs from the kinetic. Knowledge empowers, but without implementation it is as good as ignorance. In essence, so what if I figured it out?

Ahhhh...(exhaling)

Truth is I am simply getting a whole bunch of crap out of my system.... One just has to wonder how long that will last.

Effectual thinking...

So I'm taking a course that's supposed to help me think like an entrepreneur...but I can't help but wonder if the fact that we are taking this course does not disqualify us from the entrepreneurial path already. I mean, I don't know of any entrepreneur that will advice a a young mentee to go take a class. If one ever gives such an advice, then he/she does not trust your capability to start a business and wants to waste your time. When we talk about entrepreneurs in class, we talk about people who are "effectual" thinkers, that is to say to be an entrepreneur is synonymous to being an effectual thinker.

ef·fec·tu·al [ i fékchoo əl ]

adjective

Definition:

potentially effective: potentially successful in producing a desired or intended result


...but the very substance of effectual thinking "you have it in you to simply always produce the desired result without the facts and figures others require" suggests that you cannot achieve such a personality in class. So...the point of this class is?
Luckily though, I am a born entrepreneur. I inherited it from my papa, God bless you Asegun, and so I type in my blog, or check my balances, shop on ebay, etcetera etcetera, while class is going.

But yeah! So here's what I have noticed, there are two sets of people in this class who will never be entrepreneurs. The first are those who pay the most attention. They are looking for the secret to becoming an entrepreneur, they are always hoping the next class will reveal what they need to do to be that wonder entre, it won't happen. They will always feel empowered but they will always keep waiting for the best time, that thing, that partner, that product, that market, that capital...they will never be convinced enough. The other is the excessively eager. They are pumped up by every story of every entrepreneur, they can't wait to get out there and start a business. They will probably start several different businesses in the next decade, but most of them will not break-even.

Oh well, so class is almost over. I'll be bakk!!! (Arnold's voice)

Reckless driving...Oh deer!

I hate Virginia! I mean, I have been driving for almost 10 years and never received a ticket. Not one. But since moving to Virginia, I have received 3 reckless driving citations!! All within 6 months!!! I mean, surely it's not me. I drive with finesse; a magnificent combination of speed, accuracy and a 20/20 vision, or whatever vision my contact lenses give me that allow me to speed-identify any enemy of my progress (as in progress in miles to my destination). So, why me?

Ok, so some people say a 90 mph run is reckless, but I disagree. Of course it will be extremely stupid to go that fast on a busy road where you find yourself manuevering too much, but what fun is driving if you can't speed? My commute to school is over an hour, mostly on the highway, I mean come on! Anyways, although I disagree, apparently my insurance company is on my side since I still receive a 5 year good driving discount, I have reduced my speed to 10 over limit. That means, around here I'm really driving at 70 miles or less these days, but the one day I allow my car to go off cruise control and accelerate down the hill, *sirens* everywhere, the bored cop got me. (if you're asking how I knew he was bored, I was only going 17 miles above. Usually I go 30 miles over, a lot of others do too on this highway, well maybe not 30 above but 20...oh blah. Anyways, when you start chasing 17 mph above vehicles...then you have nothing to do).

I've been trying to figure out why these cops keep pulling me over (beyond the speeding fact) and I'm about to pull out the race card. I've mulled over it, I know they are excited to give tickets because they get to meet people from outside their towns, these cops were born and raised in these small towns and don't get out much, they wait on the highway and look out for travellers or students. When they ask for your driver's license they go pull your record and play bets "ooh, I bet you she's from central Jersey." "No no no, she's from New York but lives in Jersey". Dry people! I bet they'll all start panicking when they hear their tiny towns are being sued, and then they'll panic some more when they find that it's a racial case. Geez! Some people need to get out some more.

Oh deer!
Uh umph, so just under two weeks ago, my reluctant (as in it'll rather go 90 not 70) but reliable contribution to the American car industry was cruising down one of the few highways in boondock city when bambi decided to commit suicide. I keep looking past the spot when I drive past, it's like where the heck did the deer come from? BAMM, I crash into it as it runs across the highway and the only thing I remember seeing is the deer high up in the air. Well, that and the gnawing whiplash. Poor deer. The intestines were about 5 feet away from the body. My bumper was dripping with blood. It was a ghastly sight. Of course the boondock cops didn't arrive till an hour later when I had gone from rejoicing over my safety to being annoyed about my dodge. So much for #77.

So yeah, my experiences on the roads of central Virginia have been far from jolly despite my reducing my mph by 20 miles. Regardless, I look forward to better times on the road. See, after the untimely death of Bambi by the hands, or rather, bumper, wait, and hood and engine and transmission of my car (yeah, the lil' bugger totaled my car, crushed it all the way to the windshield)I was opportune to make friends with the cop that attended to me. I have since seen him on the road twice and he waved at me. Here's the thing, if I can make friends with a couple of cops in the counties I drive through on my way to school, I can be set for the rest of my duration in boondocks central. No more tickets. I won't be totalling another car to make acquaintances of course, but I will be smiling and flirting a lot more with them on the line at the grocery store and be stopping to ask the "friendly sirs" for directions on the road. Ha!

Emotional infidelity

in·fi·del·i·ty [ ìnfi déllətee ] (plural in·fi·del·i·ties)<B< span>r>
1. Unfaithfulness
2. Unfaithful act

Emotional Infidelity: "A close relationship with the opposite sex in which an intense and secretive emotional bond in formed"

Often, the birth of an improper relationship in the context of a closed one is caused by the lack of excitement. While very few people abscond in the face of excitement, it is also not uncommon for individuals to themselves bludgeon a rousing relationship just to run off to a more difficult, demanding and delusive one that is more so exciting because it bears somewhat on the border of the unacceptable. In the end though, the atrocious relationship often fills the need for excitement, or creates more excitement; take note, I have not justified any such relationship.

What I'm exploring here though is a more common but less recognized form of infidelity, the emotional kind.

Too often we excuse our friendships with members of the opposite sex because all we talk about is the weather, work, even family and maybe tennis or fantasy football, but isn't that how it starts?

You go from talking about the weather to talking about your partner to talking about intimacy with your partner, to talking about intimacy in general, to talking about how you or the other will go about intimate situations, to talking about how you AND the other will go about intimate situations.... The thing is, every normal social person will come across such a challenge when in a closed relationship. The longer one lets it linger, the deeper one moves in the chronological path to emotional infidelity.

Since emotional infidelity is not physical, how then is it harmful? Well, if it is hidden from the other member of the relationship, then it is probably harmful. If it lingers...well then, it will sooner or later turn to the physical kind of infidelity. As it were, such infidelity can occur with the object of one's emotional infidelity or with a total stranger. I haven't quite figured that one out yet. Without doubt, it is as a result of a rearranged or perhaps more accurate, warped sense of obligation and loyalty fueled by emotional infidelity, but the translation into something so physical with a stranger is almost too strong a reaction for that rationale.

Regardless, the key takeaway is to avoid such relationships. Members of the opposite sex are often exciting to talk too because of the usual opposite reflection on life, but the dangers of misusing such a relationship or hurting a partner is almost inevitable.


Ahhh...exhale....

“Fuckusing”

So we have this visiting strat faculty; Luis. Gosh, is he loads of FUN!!!

“Fuckusing/fuckus” is actually his word. It’s another way of pronouncing “focusing”. Thing is one can’t tell if his accent is actually what leads to “fun” words like “fuckus” or if he slyly organizes it into his sentences. Hot damn! He just asked “should I fuckus?” (Yes, I am writing in class).

Oh shoot! I'm about to get cold called!

Soul...

I've been busy these past coupla days; more like weeks actually. Today though, today is my day off. I dropped by precious babies off at daycare, took my car to the shop, did some cleaning (oh yeah, I'm a clean freak) and I've been playing my music ever since.

Music. While it is heavily misused these days, think of the likes of "Eccentric" American Idol '07, and RAP music, it still serves its purpose better than anything else can; It moves your soul.

Anita Baker, Tevin Campbell, Angie Stone, Erica Badu, Raphael Sadiq, D'angelo.... I have been on cloud nine since..., well, for the past hour or so. It's been so long since I indulged in some me time, but no matter how long ago its been, every time I do get to retreat into myself it feels so familiar. Kinda like walking into an air conditioned room from a hot humid smog filled Lagos street. The minute you step in, it feels like you never walked out.

*Exhale*

New Year New Things

Yep! Happy New Year!

For some reason I am not excited. Not in a bad way though. I am very grateful for the new year, but in a mature way. I look forward to better things and the manifestation of things I have been looking forward to and working towards. A friend of mine says his new year's resolution is to be more disciplined in every area of his life; while I don't believe in resolutions, I have to admit, that's a pretty hot one. Funny thing is, I pretty much make that decision every year. I don't refer to it as resolution of course; I don't like to jinx myself, but yeah, I find that it is still a point of improvement for me this year. "Improvement" (snicker) that's what they call it in the work force. They don't want to tell you you're terrible at something so they call it opportunities for improvement. Yeah well, I will persistently remember to be disciplined in every aspect of my life no matter how much I want the wind of the moment to carry me away in Jesus' Name. Amen.

There is apparently a precursor to discipline, it is called "Good decision making". Ahh! How much I have shown disdain for that this past year. Knowing the better decision from two options is never the problem, the problem often is choosing it. Yeah. I won't add that to my list of things to do though. I think if I am disciplined, I won't get my self to the sticky points that usually require me picking a not very attractive good choice.

In any case, Happy New Year to all my folks! May this year bring good decisions, good people and good things in Jesus' Name. Amen!

Cheers!